Playing with a Full Deck

We all have one...We all have that metaphorical "deck" of cards that we play.  They are used to make excuses, give reasons, to inspire, to listen to or squelch our consciences.  Some of the cards are more frayed at the edges than others, because they get played over and over. 

What are they?  Just think of the roles you play in any given day, and you get a "card".  For me they are: Wife, mother, friend, sister, daughter, Christian, customer...I could even throw a sarcastic suburbanite-college-educated-caucasian-female in there if there was a good enough reason for it. 

There's more though...much, much more!  Here are some of mine:

I-have-5-kids: I really don't like to play this one unless extremely necessary.  For example: I can't participate in the carpool; I have 5 kids, and there aren't enough seats left.

It's-good-for-me:  This can have all sorts of contexts.  I'll eat fish, because it's good for me (I'm not a huge fan of the texture of fish).  I'll park far away and walk to the store, because it's good for me.  There are the opportune times that scientific internet articles can be thrown into the mix: I'll eat this dark chocolate and have some red wine, because it's good for me.  Granted, probably not the entire bar or bottle.

Because-you-told-me-not-to: hee hee hee...For such a rule follower, I really don't like to be told I can't do something.  The inner immature child in me just wants to scream "OH YES I CAN, WATCH ME!"  This is extremely inconvenient in church business meetings; hence we do not attend them anymore (although I use the I-have-5-kids card as my excuse to others).  There are plenty of other settings this one gets used for, though, too.  They just aren't as fun.

Because-you-doubt-I-can: Similar to the previous card, but more honorable.  I love to prove people wrong when they have misperceived me and what I am capable of.  Just because I have 5 kids does not mean I can't do a lot of things anymore.  There are some limitations, yes.  I may be pushing 40, but that doesn't mean I have one foot in the convalesent hospital.

Which reminds me of a couple more:
I'm-getting-old:  Yes, it's true.  I will be 37 years old in a couple of months.  It doesn't scare me.  Thanks to running and competing, I have realized that age groups begin to get easier after 40.  Ok, more like 45 when it comes to endurance events.  But I have experienced more aches, pains and inconveniences than I ever did in my teens and twenties.  I know I have to be careful and smart when I train.  This is the card I am playing this week.  I overdid it in training hard two days in a row.  This probably wouldn't have affected me a decade ago, but I have to go with what I have.  And what I have, is an aging body. I'm getting old.

I'm-still-young:  Don't you know it!  Thirty seven is nothin', honey!  If you think being in your thirties is "old", then what do you call 40, 50, 60...?   Yes, the body is showing aging, but everything is still working normally.  I can still run almost as fast as I did in college.  One of my goals in this training season is to run a sub-6 minute mile. Why?  Because I'm still young.

So, what does all of this have to do with training for an Ironman?  There are days that I have to play the "wife" card and give up training as much as I would like in order to be there for my beloved husband.  This Saturday is his birthday, and so I will be with him, not my bike, that day.  There have been days on the track, that when I think of the splits I need to run, I remember I'm still young.  I have experienced a cramped calf on a long run, and that I'm getting old.  And through it all, I aspire to finish the Ironman, because there are those out there who doubt that I, with all my other cards in tow, can do it. 

To them I have the mature answer to give: JUST YOU WATCH ME!